Best day of my life

So one year ago today I married the love of my life. In hindsight I should have done it 10 years ago but we were always trying to get our ducks in a row and figure out our future. But let me tell you we had a great time and all who came to share this with us would agree and Ashley was beautiful Bride. Me and Ashley were very close and never did anything without one another. When she was bored I would even bring her to work with me when I could. People just loved Ashley she had that personality. She was very lovable and would talk and chat to anyone. Kids would just flock to her she was very playful. She wanted many kids and I had no doubt in my mind she would have made a wonderful mother but that wasn’t to be not sure why yet. Me and Ashley had long talks about this after her diagnosis. She said why us why does this have to happen to us. All I wanted to do is start a family and get old with you now you will have to do that with someone else. “That was supposed to be me” This broke my heart and I told her don’t understand This so-called grander plan that God has for all of us but we will fight this together to the end thats a Promise I can make. People don’t understand when you get diagnosis with terminal disease your normal life is put on hold and its the little things that make a difference. She put on such a tough outer shell but she was truly dying inside at times this I could see. Giving her a fairytale wedding was something that I will never forget and will NEVER Regret. This give us some type of normal in our life if you can imagine that. We didn’t dwell on the what if we were just trying to look forward. She had been waiting patiently for years but It wasn’t all my fault she had high expectations and wanted a large ring LOL (Every girl loves diamonds) not easy when your Battling cancer and finances are tight and you have to pay for a wedding on top of that. But then again I couldn’t think of a better way to spend the money made me so happy. Not sure why the good ones die young nothing makes sense. I just have to believe I will see my best friend again some day (Happy one year Baby ) I will drink a beer for you





10 comments on “Best day of my life

  1. Lola says:

    This must be such a hard hard time for you, sending warm thoughts your way and pray you will be ok.

  2. Darlene thiel says:

    Tim, Ashley was a beautiful bride and Me and Dad loved her very much.We will never forget all the good memories we shared on our little outings will you guys, be the trips to the covered bridge or our shopping trips or all the good meals we shared together or the time you took back roads to get to your house and got two flat tires.I loved the casino trip after your wedding when you lost the money and Ashley won it all back for you.Love you I hope someday. It will get easier!

  3. Mini says:

    Hi Tim
    Feeling your love, your loss and your pain.
    Keep that love & those memories close.
    They will give you strength.xx

  4. gray says:

    Just Beautiful! Prettiest smile ever! You will see that smile again! Keep God close!

  5. elaine mclaughlin says:

    We’re still thinking about you. When you shared your memorable wedding photos,you shared with us the happiness you once had. I hope they remind you to be the same best self you were in those days.
    I’m still hoping you can chronicle any evidence that you might suspect triggered the cancer. You had known Ashley for a long time,and would know about any NEW,out of the ordinary things that Ashley experienced in her life.
    When my dad was sick and died,I just HAD to talk to him in spirit and see him again in photos and talk about him. I was strengthened by all that.I had several comforting DAD dreams after that,too.Although,at the time, it seemed like the end of the world,I was glad my father was no longer tortured.I wanted him to have every single day he thought was worth living,but when someone says,”No more”,it is hard to know what the loving thing to do is. It’s a good thing God knew and knows the situation. After my Dad died, I did a lot more conversing with God. I needed Him to help me get my bearings back.People are born to need and give love,period.I pray that that is possible for you,after you have grieved the amount of time you need. I know it feels like you can sort of hold your breath for a lifetime,but,although courageous,is not good for you.Keep up your wonderful positive attitude.

  6. Toby Speed says:

    Tim, I love that pic of Ashley sitting with her wedding gown floating around her in a circle.

    What inspires me about Ashley is how she did it all on her own terms. You know what stands out in my mind the most? That weekend that the hospital wanted her to stick around in case of emergency. They wanted her to promise to call them and come right in if there was a problem. I think she was supposed to check in anyway on Sunday. But she got in the car with you and the dogs and drove to Michigan!! She said, no one is going to rule me, this is MY life and I’ll live it how I want. I laughed out loud when I read that blog entry. Wasn’t she something!

  7. Elle says:

    Beautiful pictures, beautiful couple<3

  8. Kellie says:

    Hi Time- those pictures are beautiful!! You must have wonderful memories, not only from that day, but from all of your days with Ashley! I wish you strength and hope for the New Year!! Lots of love, thoughts, hope, and prayers sent your way from Adam and Kellie from Salem, MA! You and Ashley have changed our lives without a doubt!

  9. Erin says:

    Hi Tim,
    I was thinking of all the times I looked forward to Ashley’s posts, and you were in my thoughts today. Having lost my Dad to pancreatic cancer a couple months before you lost Ashley, I’m more than aware of how hard it is at this time. The dust has settled, and you watch other people get back into their lives, while here you are, often just as raw as you were initially. I appreciated other people remembering that, and so I thought I would reach out to you today. You are not forgotten and Ashley is not forgotten by this on line community. I hope you are going as well as you can, but its ok to have hard days too. There are absolutely no rules with grief. Take care

  10. Norbert Ruiz says:

    Hi Tim,

    I was in contact. With your wife because I to have stage four pancreatic.cancer. Going on three years now, off and on in remission. Just wondering how you been holding up. Ashley, has given me a lot of inner strength to fight this horrible disease, more than anyone else.p, even the doctors.

    I was also wondering if her cancer started somewhere else. Something just did not add up.

    We’ll let me know.


    Sent from my iPad


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